Shit Girls Say. We all do it.
Posted by CB , Wednesday, December 14, 2011 12:18 p.m.
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In the spirit of Christmas
Posted by CB , Saturday, December 10, 2011 8:32 p.m.
Ladies, I have an interesting story to tell you about today, the story of the ugliest and weirdest Christmas present I've ever received from a guy.
The present was from my ex's father, who has a bad reputation of giving weird presents. (Even his son says this)
He gives me a box that can only contain a necklace so I start thinking, THIS MIGHT NOT BE SO BAD! So I mistakenly say 'Jewelry for a girl, you can never go wrong!'
But apparently you can.
I open the box and see a necklace. A fish necklace with some kind of greasey black cord, some weird worms looking beads on the side of the ugliest fish I have ever seen. I was in shock and luckily I was already wearing a necklace so he couldn't force it on me.
My ex later said to me 'oh my god, that is the ugliest thing I have ever seen'
I kept the necklace which I took a picture of for your enjoyment.
However, I WANT YOUR STORIES! Tell me all about your worst/weirdest present you've ever received from a guy and I'll post all the responses we get :) Pictures would be even better, although it's understandable if you've thrown it away/exchanged it.
Tips for Single Women from 1938
Posted by CB , Wednesday, November 30, 2011 6:09 p.m.
Recently came across this post on Retronaut and decided to share with my fellow ladies some tips for single ladies in the 1930's! Although pretty conservative and not always relevant today, some of the posts are still good guidelines for good behavior on dates.
The Good:
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| Still a very useful tip! |
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| Okay, you can chew gum but good posture is always good :) |
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| AHAHA! yeah, preferably, don't talk about other dates with your date ;) |
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| Something that some of us forget sometimes, drinking a bit to loosen up is fine but getting sloshed is not. |
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| Once again, don't pass out and don't flirt with other men. |
An interview with Sarah, the awesome race car driving chick!
Posted by CB , Tuesday, November 22, 2011 4:12 p.m.
If you've been following the I hate men Group on Facebook, you may have noticed some posts from my friend Sarah Cornett-Ching, the race car driver! As one of the only female drivers out there, Sarah is kicking men's asses and proving just how awesome women are! This qualifies her to be the first women to be interviewed as a role model and inspiration on this blog. :)
Tell us a bit about the kind of races you do, the car you use, etc...
I race in a series that travels across British Columbia and I made my debut in the Nascar Canadian Tire Series this year. The car I race in is a Late Model, nothing about it is stock like a street car. Everything is fabricated and aftermarket. The motors we race make 460 horsepower!
When and why did you start racing?
I started racing when I was 12 years old, I had been helping my dad with his race team for years and had been asking for a race car of my own. One day, he took us to the shop and sitting outside was my first race car. The funny part is my mom and I were both surprised but in different ways! I was excited and happy and my mom was ready to kill my dad for putting her 12 year old daughter in the seat of a race car.
What is the most demanding part?
The most demanding part is because we race almost every week there is a lot of work getting the car ready between races. If we do get involved in an altercation one week we work every night until midnight or later making the car ready to race the next week.
How does it feel to be a girl in such a male-dominated career?
The good and bad side of being a female in the sport is that everything I do is under a magnifying glass. If I do well in a race I get way more attention and media than any other driver. If I crash though it is automatically assumed to be my fault and its said I'm not ready to be racing at the level I'm at etc. Its a double edged sword.
Brotips and single girl problems.
Posted by CB , Monday, November 14, 2011 8:16 p.m.
Snooki has her 'guidette problems', I have single girl problems.
Single girl problem of the month: The hot new security guy at work has a girlfriend.
Oh yeah, and here are some awesome brotips. Just cause :)
Single Girl's Night In
Posted by CB , Thursday, November 10, 2011 1:12 a.m.
Single girls out there, I know that sometimes you can feel like being single is the worst thing in the world. But tonight, I finally understood what one of my guy-friends has been trying to make me understand:
Sometimes, being alone is nice.
Tonight started off with me going to Walmart to look at the Christmas decorations. I ended up being ultra cheesy and buying a scented candle with a Christmas themed scent, mulled cider.
I then proceeded to blow off a nice guy. I felt super shitty about it but I just didn't feel ready for a boyfriend which I knew that's what he wanted.
My next single girl move? I played 90's alt music on acoustic guitar and sang. For myself. (My new oldish jam: Linger by the Cranberries)
I watched 90210 and smelled my delicious candle.
I know that I'm not going to want to be alone like this every night, but every once in a while, it's fantastic.
Love your friends, but love yourself.
To the Men of this World
Posted by CB , Wednesday, November 9, 2011 9:42 p.m.
50 things she wishes you knew
Posted by CB , Thursday, November 3, 2011 2:26 p.m.
Okay, I stole this from a website but I still think it's very relevant and I'm sure you ladies will recognize yourselves in ALOT of these. Enjoy :)
Universal truths that all men should--but don't--understand
1. Saying "I love you" immediately before, during, or following sex doesn't count.
2. Real men drive stick shift.
3. I will leave if you lie.
4. You are cute in raglan-sleeved T-shirts (two-toned baseball undershirts).
5. I'm convinced I'm pregnant and obsess about it for a minimum of 24 to 48 hours before my period, even when I have no rational reason to think so.
6. I love it when you hug me from behind and whisper in my ear.
7. "Fine" is never an appropriate response when I ask you how I look.
8. Most of the time when I fantasize, it's about you.
9. I'm terrified of becoming my mother, even though I admire her.
10. I get turned on simply seeing that I have an e-mail from you.
11. I expect you to call me.
12. Only rock stars are allowed to wear leather pants.
13. I'm scared of losing my independence.
14. I'm more forgiving of you than I really should be.
15. Oral sex is your get-out-of-the-doghouse-free card. Manolo Blahnik shoes also do the trick.
16. You did something bad. I seem cool with it. I'm not. (See directly above.)
17. If I'm not having sex with you, I'm... a. ...having a fat day. b. ...not feeling "connected" to you. c. ...blackmailing you to get something I want.
18. Shoes determine whether you're fashionable or not.
19. I own a Debbie Gibson CD, and I'm not afraid to use it.
20. When I compare my flabby tummy to a kangaroo pouch, say nothing.
21. A man I love plans the occasional fancy-schmancy dress-up date and impromptu weekend getaways, and he buys my favorite candy in advance when we're just going to the movies.
22. You look hot in hooded clothing items.
23. You should never tell me what to do.
24. If I slept over, you owe me breakfast.
25. My breasts love much licking and sucking.
Men, women, relationships.
Posted by CB , Wednesday, October 26, 2011 7:39 p.m.
Some important facts you should know before getting into a relationship, taken from Jerry Seinfeld's book 'Seinlanguage'
Dating, what is it really?:
Dating is pressure and tension. What is a date really, but a job interview that lasts all night?
Spending the night at somebody else's house:
It could happen. It's happened to a lot of people. You always think to yourself, 'I can handle this. It's no big deal.'
But your hair the next morning is the true reflection of how you really feel inside. Your hair freaks out when it wakes up at somebody else's house. You go in the bathroom, it's like
'This is not our sink, this is not our brush, this is not our mirror--AAHHH!!'
The basic conflict between men and women sexually:
Men are like firemen. To them, sex is an emergency, and no matter what they're doing, they can be ready in two minutes.
Women, on the other hand, are like fire. They're very exciting, but the conditions have to be exactly right for it to occur.
The relationship's owner's manual:
Each man and each woman actually does have an owner's manual. Nothing's written down anywhere, but the directions for operation of an individual in a relationship are detailed and specific nonetheless.
So when you start out with someone, you're essentially driving a strange car for the first time and none of the controls are labeled. The wipers come on at strange times, sometimes you stall. On top of that, we've met people with bad steering, no brakes, needs a muffler, headlights a little dim, too much in the trunk, not enough under the hood, prone to backfiring, won't turn over, and just plain out of gas.
Where were you two years ago? My story.
Posted by KB , Tuesday, October 25, 2011 1:13 p.m.
After reading Catherine's post about where she was two years ago, I started myself thinking about how much things have changed in the past two years.
Two years ago was the worst chapter of my life so far. Two years ago is the reason why I was inspired to start this blog with Catherine a couple months ago, it is the reason why I hated men so badly. I was recovering from the relationship that left me so wounded. This may sound tragic and extremely serious, it sort of is. But fear not, the chapter is closed.
So okay, enough suspense. Three years ago, I started dating this guy. Let's name him Mr.X, even though we should call him the Devil. So yes, we started dating, and in the beginning it was very unofficial, foggy and sneaky. ( if you're wondering why, it is because I dated one of Mr.X's best friends before, so he was sort of breaking the BroCode: you don't date your friend's ex.) So after a couple months, I decided to stop with all the bullshit and ask him straight up to either admit we were exclusive or let me go. Being the great catch that I am, Mr.X obviously decided to call me his girlfriend.
The relationship lasted about two years, but the last year was pure torture. I will not go into details about how bad, abusive and poisonous the relationship was, but what I will say is that I should've never commited to this person. I guess the wise thing to say here is that you learn from your mistakes and that you have to take risks to realize what you want and what you deserve, but to be honest, this was one lesson I didn't have to learn. It was not essential to my life, and it wasn't something I had to go trough to become a better person.
Reader story:He began building up the trust, leading me to the mistake of sleeping with the guy
Posted by CB , Saturday, October 22, 2011 8:55 p.m.
A story from a friend of mine who learned that men are dicks the hard way. :(
During the process I apparently revealed all my deepest, darkest secrets. He was looking after me all night and for the next few days he was doing his best to try and help with all the issues I confessed to him, seems pretty nice right? I thought so too.
So we were seeing a lot of each other over the next few weeks and he was being extremely caring and nice to me. However I didn’t want to be dating anyone so I told him we should just be friends. He then insisted on dating anyway so somewhat reluctantly I agreed. He then began building up the trust, thus leading me to make the mistake of sleeping with the guy, which normally wouldn’t have been too big of a deal had it not been my first time.
Just 2 days after this occured he then proceeded to dump me, saying we were “too serious” and he didn’t want to hurt such a fragile girl. As if this wasn’t confusing enough, the next day when I had landed myself in the hospital (sickness) he thought it would be nice to come visit me...
WTF Buddy?
Thanks for making life so confusing, this is why I hate men.
I hate men and I love Sephora!
Posted by CB 12:14 a.m.
So in case you ladies didn't know, I recently got hired at Sephora in Quebec city and I LOVE IT!
It's the complete opposite of the restaurant I was working at, I'm working in an almost all women environment (plus some fabulous gay men) and I get to play with makeup all day! Doesn't that sound fantastic?
WELL IT IS!
Some of my new favs to share with you :)
Kat Von D Lipsticks.. Or scratch that, EVERYTHING!
If any of you are ever in the Quebec city area, feel free to come visit me and I'll show you some of the awesome stuff we have, stuff even a non-makeup lover will love.
:)
Unlikely style icon: Violet Baudelaire
Posted by CB , Monday, October 17, 2011 7:29 p.m.
Watching the Series of Unfortunate Events movie, I realized that I am IN LOVE with Violet Baudelaire's Victorian/Classic Chic/Kinda goth looks. Although it is a look that might be difficult to pull off in real life as a whole, several parts are perfect for fall or for hunting down Count Olaf.
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| Personally, I am IN LOVE with this coat. ABSOLUTELY gorgeous. |
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| The costumes are designed by Colleen Atwood, who also designed the Alice in Wonderland costumes. BRILLIANT woman. |
Where were you 2 years ago?
Posted by CB , Sunday, October 16, 2011 10:58 p.m.
A friend of mine recently reconnected with an ex from 2 years ago on Facebook and it got me to thinking,
Where was I two years ago?
Two years ago, at this time me and my boyfriend were living together after only a couple of months of living in Quebec. We had invited my friend and her boyfriend to our place for a fancy 'adult type' dinner, with wine and a home cooked meal. (you know, not my specialty of nachos and grilled cheese)
Now, I've gone back to my single girl lifestyle of KD and cheese and crackers with some occasional fancier cooking which reminds me that although I have changed alot from where I was 2 years ago, some things never change. I can cook salmon now but that doesn't mean I'm going to stop eating KD ;)
And the unexpected pop-in from men you'd almost forgotten about. Maybe you've both changed a bit and both learned from the 2 years apart.
And maybe, you still never want to see him again ;)
And the one lesson I think I've learned and want to teach is
Don't waste your time being sad about a man.
Life is too short and goes by too fast.
Cliché?
Yes but clichés only begin because the same things are often said. And often, they are true.
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| 2 years ago, I was holding this dumb cat, not knowing yet that I was about to start living\hating this cat for the next year. You never know what will happen.... |
Halloween Hoes
Posted by CB , Thursday, October 13, 2011 12:11 a.m.
Hello ladies!
It is now October 12th which means yo asses should be in gear for the costumed event that is Halloween. I'm a huge dress up fan and Halloween is the only holiday where I can get dressed up and not be judged as a random dressed up weirdo.
HOWEVER, somewhere along the lines Halloween became Hoe-lloween.
Sexy cop, sexy fireman,sexy referee,sexy teddy bear, sexy lumberjack, sexy mafia gangster,
ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
It's time to kick it up a notch and find a classy, cute and original costume that can still be sexy without being skanky!
This Halloween, let's be fun and original and leave those sex store outfits at home!
Some good costume ideas (okay, some I've already done): Lucky Charm (leprechaun), senorita, Cruella DeVille, anyone from Grease, flapper girl, Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz, any Disney Princess, Marilyn Monroe, Queen of Hearts, Frankenstein's bride, an Avatar, Sally from a Nightmare before Christmas, a skeleton (have you SEEN those awesome leggings?), Carmen san Diego, Pikachu, anyone from KISS, etc....
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| THIS IS GOOD! :) |
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| THIS IS GOOD! :) |
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| THIS IS GOOD! :) |
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| Not good. |
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| Traumatizing. |
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| Turning childhood things like teddy bears and Dr Seuss sexy is just wrong. |
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| OH BAD BAD BADDDD. |
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| Okay, maybe a sexy pikachu isn't too bad ;) |
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| Sexy mafia gangster? No such thing. |
I also leave you with hours of enjoyment on http://www.wtfcostumes.com/ while listening to http://8tracks.com/chelenza/monster-mash-up
And feel free to tell me your awesome costume ideas to add to the list! I'm being Wilma from the Flintstones so no copying my idea! ;)
Reader story: I was in a non-committed relationship, he wasn't committed.
Posted by CB , Tuesday, October 4, 2011 1:46 a.m.
Another story about men sucking. Although my personal opinion is HE CAN SUCK IT!
'I was in a non commited relationship (he wasn't commited) with this guy for about a year. We pretty much lived together at this point, best friends for sure, when one day he asks me to take out my things from his place. Curious as to why, he tells me is seeing this girl he met once now. They had been talking a lot over text, but I hadn't been overly concerned. Why? Because she was 15, and he was 22. Why would I be concerned?
Ha! So, I have been kicked out of his life as his 'partner'. Upset? Not anymore. His young girlfriend got pregnant two days after the 'Offical' together.
Slightly ashamed that I wasted a year of my life with this guy. Worth it? Definately not.'
- Anonymous
Reader story: My friend told the guy I liked that I wanted his babies
Posted by CB , Saturday, September 24, 2011 3:11 p.m.
A reader story from a high school girl who shows us that unfortunately, guys don't really mature from high school.
So, it all started when one of my friends told me she liked one of my best guy friends...
Obviously being my naive young self, still in high school, ( having pretty much never had any experience with guys cause the dating stuff never EVER seems to happen to ME),
I decided I wanted to try and interfere slightly, to try and make something happen for them, even though it couldn't for me.
So after little time at all, I found out that the feeling between them was mutual. After a little while though, my guy friend had stopped talking to me about my friend, so I asked him why. He told me it was because he thought I told my friend everything he told me about her. I denied it and told him that i'd only told her one thing( which wasn't really that important at all honestly).
He got really mad at me. And when i say really mad girls, i mean it.
I didnt think this guy would ever get mad at me. But he was pissed.
After a few weeks though, things were back to normal... or so i thought.
(*NOTE FROM CAT: See how men pretend they are above bitchy behavior and say girls only do this? PFFFT)
The thing was, this guy knew who I liked, because i liked his best friend, lets call him Bob! And before he got all mad at me (for no reason) we'd talk about how we liked each others best friends.
Unfortunately for me, the feeling was not mutual for some reason...
A few weeks later, standing with a group of mostly guy friends, EVERYBODY started randomly saying BOB in the conversation with me. I didnt understand what was going on and played it cool.
The only person that knew i liked Bob was of course was my best guy friend. This was definitively the first hint that he'd told people, but i tried to ignore the fact and pretend that i didn't care and that nothing had happened, that i wasn't humiliated...
A few weeks later, another guy friend finally told me that my friend had told EVERYBODY that i liked Bob..
I actually didn't care that much, cause this was a long time after our fight that i finally found this out, and i had moved on from Bob.
But then a few weeks later, my friend and i were talking, and he told me what he'd told Bob.
I was wondering why Bob had been avoiding me for the past few weeks cause we used to have a pretty good relationship, and i actually had some hope that maybe for once, something would happen for me. But now, he was just looking scared when he saw me and I found out why... My friend didn't tell bob that i liked him. OH NO!
From my best guy friend.
And this ladies, is why i hate men.
You cant trust any of them.
I actually didn't care that much, cause this was a long time after our fight that i finally found this out, and i had moved on from Bob.
But then a few weeks later, my friend and i were talking, and he told me what he'd told Bob.
I was wondering why Bob had been avoiding me for the past few weeks cause we used to have a pretty good relationship, and i actually had some hope that maybe for once, something would happen for me. But now, he was just looking scared when he saw me and I found out why... My friend didn't tell bob that i liked him. OH NO!
His exact words: he told bob that i "wanted his babies, that i stalked him, and that i was obsessively in love with him and told everybody about him and my love for him"This.
From my best guy friend.
And this ladies, is why i hate men.
You cant trust any of them.
Douchebag of the Year Awards
Posted by CB , Sunday, September 18, 2011 1:02 p.m.
We need you to nominate a man you know in one or several of these categories!
- Biggest Douchebag Behavior
- Best Douchebag Attire
- Most Unexpected Douchebag
- Most In Denial Douchebag (or Wannabe Douchebag)
- Least Douchebag Guy
- Best Dressed Guy
- Best Recovery from Douchebag behavior
We'd prefer if you nominate a guy you personally know,(cause we know you probably met several douches this year) but celebrities can do as well.
Please send your nominations to men_haters@yahoo.ca or post in the Facebook group or page following these guidelines:
Name: (Real or Fictional)
Award: (Name of the Award this man deserves)
Reasoning: (Description of the reason or event witnessed that make this man a candidate for this award)
Other proof: (Oh god, we'd just LOVE a picture or video of this guy or event! Please send pictures to email so we can blur out the face if necessary)
We will be posting our own nominations on the blog shortly. Can't wait to see what you come up with! :)
99 Things Women Do That Turn Men On
Posted by CB , Saturday, September 17, 2011 12:50 p.m.
This is something I found on one of my favorite websites Guyspeak. I know, I know, you're thinking A MAN WROTE THIS? But this is a man to be admired from a website of more great men.
99 Things Women Do That Turn Guys On
How do I get a guy to notice me? How do I flirt with a guy? What makes a woman "hot" to men?
We get various iterations of this question on a daily basis. Which is great -- they're valid questions. That's why I decided to help you by making this list of 99 (count 'em!) random things that turn guys on. All guys? No. But most of them.
Now on with the countdown.
Guys are turned on when you...
1. Smile
2. Make random physical contact: grab his arm, hug him, smack his ass
3. Are witty
4. Say hi to him first
5. Compliment him
6. Impress him with your brilliance
7. Love long slow kisses
8. Remember his name
9. Beat him in Scrabble (sometimes, not every time)
10. Play guitar
11. Try new things
12. Laugh at his jokes (if they're funny, that is. No charity laughs, please.)
13. Skinny dip
14. Wear just a hint of perfume
15. Dance
16. Sing
17. Take his side
18. Are quick to forgive people
19. Stand up for your friends
20. Sleep naked
21. Play videogames
22. Have a sense of humor
23. Have compassion and empathy
24. Know how to play poker
25. Tell him what you want during sex
26. Tell him when you like what he's doing during sex
27. Quote funny movies like Office Space, Caddyshack, Raising Arizona
28. Run your hands through his hair when he kisses you
29. Know the words to "Misty Mountain Hop" and "Sweet Child O' Mine"
30. Wear sexy underwear
31. Aren't ashamed of your body
32. Love kids
33. Love dogs
34. Hate cats*
35. Have pictures of your nieces and nephews on your Facebook page
36. Go braless
37. Go barefoot
38. Love different kinds of food
39. Make the first move
40. Make bad jokes
41. Have big dreams
42. Love to read
43. Love to laugh
44. Love tickle fights
45. Treat people with kindness, whether they're your friends or the cashier
46. Sit in his lap
47. Are confident and uninhibited in the sack
48. Can laugh at yourself
49. Have pet names for him
50. Have pet names for your boobs
51. Wear your hair up
52. Give people the benefit of the doubt
53. Do the right thing
54. Know that songs like "It's My Life" and "The First Cut Is The Deepest" are remakes.
55. Strip for him
56. Want to see the world
57. Cook (even if you aren't very good at it)
58. Smell like lilacs and/or honeysuckle
59. Whisper naughty things in his ear out of the blue
60. Let him take care of you
61. Wear Chuck Taylors or Vans
62. Bite him sometimes (not too hard, please)
63. Order a cheeseburger and fries instead of salad at least once
64. Text him
65. Sext him
66. Give him back rubs
67. Undress him
68. Let him undress you
69. Say his name during sex
70. Yell his name during sex
71. Randomly break out into foreign languages you don't even know during sex
72. Think Sex And The City is lame-o (because it is)
73. Want to wrestle
74. Read trashy mags like InTouch Weekly or Us
75. Can be tough when you need to
76. Tell him how you feel about him
77. Tell him he's sexy
78. Invite him into the shower with you
79. Wash his back
80. Praise his shampoo mohawk even though you've seen it 200 times
81. Would do anything for your friends
82. Ride the roller coaster
83. Hug him from behind
84. Order him to do you. Now.
85. Say things like "We're a perfect match" or "You fit me just right"
86. Admit when you're wrong
87. Accept his apology when he's wrong
88. Get a new 'do
89. Take him to Vegas
90. Aren't afraid to get dirty
91. Wear glasses
92. Buy him something he needed but didn't know it
93. Snuggle
94. Kiss his neck
95. Cheer him up when he's down
96. Brag on him to your friends
97. Write him notes
98. Hold his hand
99. Defend him
No one does all these things. You don't have to do any of them, for that matter. But for those of you wondering what you can do to get noticed or turn a guy on, now you've got 99 options.
We get various iterations of this question on a daily basis. Which is great -- they're valid questions. That's why I decided to help you by making this list of 99 (count 'em!) random things that turn guys on. All guys? No. But most of them.
Now on with the countdown.
Guys are turned on when you...
1. Smile
2. Make random physical contact: grab his arm, hug him, smack his ass
3. Are witty
4. Say hi to him first
5. Compliment him
6. Impress him with your brilliance
7. Love long slow kisses
8. Remember his name
9. Beat him in Scrabble (sometimes, not every time)
10. Play guitar
11. Try new things
12. Laugh at his jokes (if they're funny, that is. No charity laughs, please.)
13. Skinny dip
14. Wear just a hint of perfume
15. Dance
16. Sing
17. Take his side
18. Are quick to forgive people
19. Stand up for your friends
20. Sleep naked
21. Play videogames
22. Have a sense of humor
23. Have compassion and empathy
24. Know how to play poker
25. Tell him what you want during sex
26. Tell him when you like what he's doing during sex
27. Quote funny movies like Office Space, Caddyshack, Raising Arizona
28. Run your hands through his hair when he kisses you
29. Know the words to "Misty Mountain Hop" and "Sweet Child O' Mine"
30. Wear sexy underwear
31. Aren't ashamed of your body
32. Love kids
33. Love dogs
34. Hate cats*
35. Have pictures of your nieces and nephews on your Facebook page
36. Go braless
37. Go barefoot
38. Love different kinds of food
39. Make the first move
40. Make bad jokes
41. Have big dreams
42. Love to read
43. Love to laugh
44. Love tickle fights
45. Treat people with kindness, whether they're your friends or the cashier
46. Sit in his lap
47. Are confident and uninhibited in the sack
48. Can laugh at yourself
49. Have pet names for him
50. Have pet names for your boobs
51. Wear your hair up
52. Give people the benefit of the doubt
53. Do the right thing
54. Know that songs like "It's My Life" and "The First Cut Is The Deepest" are remakes.
55. Strip for him
56. Want to see the world
57. Cook (even if you aren't very good at it)
58. Smell like lilacs and/or honeysuckle
59. Whisper naughty things in his ear out of the blue
60. Let him take care of you
61. Wear Chuck Taylors or Vans
62. Bite him sometimes (not too hard, please)
63. Order a cheeseburger and fries instead of salad at least once
64. Text him
65. Sext him
66. Give him back rubs
67. Undress him
68. Let him undress you
69. Say his name during sex
70. Yell his name during sex
71. Randomly break out into foreign languages you don't even know during sex
72. Think Sex And The City is lame-o (because it is)
73. Want to wrestle
74. Read trashy mags like InTouch Weekly or Us
75. Can be tough when you need to
76. Tell him how you feel about him
77. Tell him he's sexy
78. Invite him into the shower with you
79. Wash his back
80. Praise his shampoo mohawk even though you've seen it 200 times
81. Would do anything for your friends
82. Ride the roller coaster
83. Hug him from behind
84. Order him to do you. Now.
85. Say things like "We're a perfect match" or "You fit me just right"
86. Admit when you're wrong
87. Accept his apology when he's wrong
88. Get a new 'do
89. Take him to Vegas
90. Aren't afraid to get dirty
91. Wear glasses
92. Buy him something he needed but didn't know it
93. Snuggle
94. Kiss his neck
95. Cheer him up when he's down
96. Brag on him to your friends
97. Write him notes
98. Hold his hand
99. Defend him
No one does all these things. You don't have to do any of them, for that matter. But for those of you wondering what you can do to get noticed or turn a guy on, now you've got 99 options.
The Man Organization
Posted by CB , Thursday, September 8, 2011 5:05 p.m.
A hilarious Jerry Seinfeld skit about men and women. Just watch, it's only a minute but it will make you smile whenever you see men :)
Most Traumatizing Event of Summer 2011 Award
Posted by CB 1:24 a.m.
And the award goes to...
THAT TIME THAT NASTY WEIRD OLD MAN AT THE RESTAURANT BARGED IN ON OUR PHOTO!
And I stomped on his male ego.
Posted by CB , Saturday, September 3, 2011 2:19 p.m.
Last night I went to play foosball with a couple of my friends and those who know me, know that I love/am pretty good at this game.
My opponent was a tall blonde guy who hit on me shamelessly before the game, bringing in bad pickup lines such as 'I'm going to play this game for you, I'm going to win for you' (OH PUHLEASE)
We start playing and his ball gets in my zone (I'm goalie) and he goes 'If I get this one in, you have to give me a kiss. I know I'm going to get it in so you have to give me a kiss when I do. Watch this, I'm going to get it in'
The kid doesn't stop. He's going on and on about how he's going to get it in.
He hits it, I hit it right back and it slams into his goal at the other end of the table.
Everyone around us goes OOOHHHHHH!!!! And the poor kid pulls his hat down and probably wants to die. Everyone around is high-fiving me and telling him how much I showed him. Plus, it was a beautiful shot.
I have to say, I think I stomped on his male ego and hit him where it hurts haha.
I lost the game (he was in a fury after that and scoring like crazy) but it doesn't matter, I had already won just by showing him who was boss.
FOOSBALL GIRL POWER!!! :)
Brotips for bros and hoes
Posted by CB , Tuesday, August 30, 2011 1:15 p.m.
A selection of my favorite Brotips for you today. Enjoy :)
Reader story: A sad divorce story.
Posted by CB , Sunday, August 28, 2011 12:14 p.m.
A sad and chilling story for you ladies this morning from a friend of mine who witnessed the sad repercussions of divorce on a woman.
Hi Catherine
- I just heard the most incredibly sad story and I really want to share it. I know it isn't really the type of thing you usually post in your blog but I am just so angry i really didn't know what to do. If worst comes to worst I can always just post it on my own facebook anyhow this is the little blurb I've written tell me what you think:
"After a day of lying in bed with excruciating cramps doing nothing but watch sickly sweet anime’s and doing dramaturgical work I finally convinced myself that I should get outside before all of the sunlight was gone. I popped in my earbuds and grabbed my Chinese Opera sheet music and headed to the park... Soon enough I gave up trying to transcribe the music I had set out to and began childishly playing in the grass looking for clovers. I began singing to myself and unwittingly began singing Edith Piaf’s “Milord” which details a story of a prostitute trying to proposition a heartbroken man.
No sooner had I finished the song than a woman in her late 30’s carrying a child’s backpack approached me and asked me in French : “ Have you had the same thing happen to you?” Not really understanding her meaning, and also being a bit weary of the situation, I looked at her with a look of perplextion and didn’t say anything.
She then continued “...well I just thought that because of the song you were singing that you had had someone leave you like me.” Immediately I understood.
The woman then proceeded to tell me her sad story of how her husband had left her for another woman and how her family had disowned her for still loving him. How she needed to move back in with her mother who belittled her for being depressed and wounded. How for reasons out of her control documents were now being processed which would declare her marriage nullified. How in her desperate search for employment she had to go through the vile process of being offered low paying positions in exchange for sexual favours.
I listened to the miserable story and I eventually met the lady’s 3 year old daughter who immediately began bringing me gifts and hugging me and kissing me whenever she came near. From what I understood the couple were no longer together, that the man thought that taking a year break would fix everything. He needed to heal from the pain she inflicted upon her and she needed to heal her wounds. Of course this is not at all what Madelina (I soon discovered her name) wanted to happen, she wanted them to be together. “I just want my little family back” she repeated through tears. It was clear that all she had ever wanted out of life was to be a wife and a mother.
This man destroyed and was punishing this lovely lady because in her rage over the other woman and his refusal to stop seeing her she pushed over the bookcase that had all of his gaming material and all of his video games were ruined. (From what I can gather this man is in his mid 40’s)
I am sorry but WTF!!! How is this allowed to happen? What kind of Patriarchal society do we live in that makes it possible for a man to leave his wife with nothing and for society to somehow blame the woman! Her entire family has disowned her because she loves this man. Although I think everyone in the world, aside from herself, can see that this is an immature bum who is only torturing her, I know further punishment to coheres her into making the right decision is the last thing that this woman needs. This poor woman feels soo alone that the only person she can talk to is some stranger in the park.
The worst parts is that I recognize her state everything is difficult to do she wants to die, she feels like a failure, she is humiliated and she feels alone... abandoned. This is the worst situation for someone who is in such a volatile state to be in.
How can men be so immature and selfish somehow the act of destroying a stack of video games is not equal to openly cheating on your partner. Oh yes and refusing to leave your girlfriend while you’re still with your wife. Emotions can get the best of us and make us think irrationally. Madelina’s words still echo in my mind “I’m so afraid that he won’t come back...” “No matter what I do everything reminds me of our life, you can’t erase 10 years...I know I will always love him.”
I know this woman is in a lot of pain and a bit disillusioned as to what is right but I don’t think anyone can force her into cutting her husband out of her life. I can’t understand how this man thinks that this woman is disposable... and that his loving daughter deserves to be without a father for an entire year... men really disgust me some times.
Natasha Perry-Fagant
Sex dilemma!
Posted by KB , Friday, August 26, 2011 9:42 a.m.
So lately I've started dating this guy (yes I know, SHOCKER!!!!) and sex has been on our minds.
So I definately want your advice, dear men haters, on when is the best time to have sex with a guy you just started to date.
A) 3rd date rule!
B) A month- that seems about right.
C) When you feel comfortable
D) First date- you want to know what's up... and what's not.
So ladies, please give me your opinion! This is crucial :)
You can either post your answer in the comment box below, or on the Facebook page!
Men vs shoes.
Posted by CB 12:01 a.m.
So today I went shopping for shoes. Found some KILLAAAAA boots, beautiful sexy cowgirl-ish hot boots. And it made me think,Who needs a man when they've got hot new boots?
Especially since I found out today that one of my best guy friends has stopped talking to me because he has a girlfriend now... It makes me sad but at least I've got hot boots. :)
Reader story: A Lesson in Self-Respect
Posted by CB , Monday, August 15, 2011 5:06 p.m.
Another reader story from a dear friend of mine. God men suck sometimes!
Try as we might to be powerful and independent, we women never give ourselves the credit we deserve. I myself had an experience that certainly put into perspective my self-worth and what exactly I DIDN'T deserve. Bear with me while I tell my tale.It started off in my first year of university. I was young, naive, and willing to believe that all men were going to be as nice as the single guy who waited patiently for me to date him for two years in high school (but that’s a whole different story!). Oh, how wrong I was. The guy in question was decently hot, but not too hot that he was 100% out of my league, and came across as funny and caring. I made the mistake to go home with him the very first drunken night that we hung out. No sex or anything though, I wasn't THAT easy.
The first two weeks of our..hmm…”relationship”….were so promising; I wasted hours upon hours of my days lusting over him. I woke up to “good morning beautiful” text messages and fell asleep to equally charming ones. I slept over often enough to leave a toothbrush in his bathroom. To my great surprise and disappointment, things turned sour the minute I left town.
I had to go back home one weekend for some minor surgery, and although I was sad to be missing out on a weekend of partying, I was sure that this soon to be discovered d-bag would be kind enough to keep it in his pants for six days while I was recovering. One of my girlfriends texted me that Friday night to ask how things were going between this guy and I, so I replied honestly saying that I definitely had feelings for him. I was so clueless I thought she was just making small talk with me!
That, my friends, was red flag #1 that I so blindly missed. When I returned back to campus I soon found out that the two fuckers had sex while I was in bed high on painkillers. Great. THIS exact moment is where I should have thought: “hey, he’s a complete loser, GET OUT”. However, I forgave him. I know, I know. Shame on me.
He then continued to lead me on for another month or two, only to drop me a: “sorry I need to concentrate on my studies” text and never speak to me again. Complete and udder mindfuck! And do you want to know what the worst part is? I still would have gone back to the guy. He had me wrapped around his finger.
At the time I thought: “What on Earth did I do to deserve that?” But the answer is quite clear to me now. You see ladies, by uttering the words “I forgive you” I made it clear to him that I was a girl with no self-respect, who didn’t believe that she was worthy of better treatment. If I, myself, didn't possess the sense of worth I merited, why should he bother to treat me with it? Right there, I basically gave him permission to treat me like a piece of shit.
For a situation that really did wreck me more than I’d like to admit, I am still able to say that it’s taught me immeasurably important things. Although I still think it’s fair to expect back the same level of respect from people that you initially put out, I also believe that it’s fair to expect back the same level of respect from people that you believe you deserve and are worthy of. Hopefully one day I’ll forget the asshole that ruined so many of my nights, but right now I remember him as that loser that will never know what a great girl he missed out on.
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